Just bummed

Así que sé que ha sido un rato desde que yo he anunciado un blog pero he habido mucho pasando y realmente no tiene indicio donde comenzar. Im perdiendo lentamente el peso que no es bueno pero tan rápidamente como querría. En julio yo fui al lado de mi padre reunión familiar que usted habla de sentirse impar. Sentía realmente como yo no perteneció como todo fui fue niño del amor de mi padre tan probablemente acostumbrado hace eso otra vez. En las últimas semanas yo he tenido varios hit de machos en mí y bonito mucho pide sexo. ¡Lo siento que yo no soy una MUJERZUELA! !!!!! Yo tan soy cansado de chavos está justo como pero usted no estuvo con él por qué mí. Quizá porque yo me puse quiero a o quizá porque el corazón pertenece al someoen aunque yo no sea supuesto a. ¡Uno de ellos sucede ser un chavo que he sabido para lo que se siente como jamás y él conoce a muchos los chavos que feché y siempre he sido esta manera hacia mí pero puedo parecer conseguir la insinuación NOOOOOOOO que soy hola si todo deseé fue sexo que podría tener ningún pinche tiempo yo deseé pero eso no es lo que Iwant! !!!!!! Yo realmente deseo realmente una oportunidad con el hombre que posee el corazón. es eso realmente preguntar demasiado. Adivino que soy justo fustrated con mucho material. Por lo menos yo todavía trabajo y Kris vuelve a la escuela pronto. Bien iré tan puedo conseguir algún sueño para el trabajo.

Been awhile

So today is the 2nd day of Aug. We have busy weeks coming up mainly just the first part of it. Tomorrow we have our boy scout meeting then the following Monday we go in for school registration they do not have the lists posted yet of what the kids will need go figure it's frankfort's schools. Kris will go back to school on the 19th and of course I will not be there on his first day because I can't afford to miss any days I am trying hard to get hired on full time this year but who knows. Not a lot going on other than that and always working and enjoying my weekends as much as I can. This past week we went and saw G-force 3-D it was pretty good we went one day right after work instead of waiting for the weekend so there weren't many people there helped Kris out ALOT! He doesn't go back to see his therapist till later in the month and won't see the Dr. till Oct. for his meds so that must mean they think he is doing better. From a year ago MUCH better from 2 years ago MUCH MUCH better it's just taking time. When he's tired or there's too much going on or a large crowd seems to be when he acts up the most so we are learning how to try to avoid most of those kinds of situations can't avoid them all the time but learning how to help him cope with it. I did get a new phone this weekend with a full keyboard still same number and still a virgin mobile but i like the phone although i think you have to be really smart to figure out some of the stuff on it. We got to looking at it and it works with T-coil which would be great for my mom because of the hearing aids we've never had a phone that will work with her hearing aids so she's thinking about going ahead and getting a second one plus she could learn to text on this one better than the other one since she now knows how to im. I'm working on trying to get her up to speed with all this newage stuff LOL. Well I need to get going so I can get a few things done before bed. Busy busy busy day tomorrow.

First week done!!!

So yea today is Friday so happy it is. I am sore in places I forgot could get sore lol. My first week of being back at work is finally done. Next friday will be better its called PAYDAY!!! Kris is very excited about that cuz I told him we could go to Monkey Joe's that night so he could play after I stop and pay a couple of bills. Not much going on right now. Wed. was his last day of school he will be going to a couple of special classes this summer nothing too long. I think he has one in June that will last 3 or 4days like 2 hrs each day the he has 2 in July that are for 2 weeks a total of 4 hours a day (2hrs each) He's looking forward to that. His teachers sent home papers for him to work on during summer plus mamaw is going to make him practice writing everyday (m-f) and he has to read at least one book a day to help him imporve. Since they changed his meds back and he got his glasses his reading is starting to improve. He's still a little behind but that is understandable. His writing however SUCK. I swear my son could be a doc. the way he writes. You can not read it at all lol. He hates writing he says it makes his hand hurt. Well hell I hate packing mints it makes my back, arms and hands hurt not count feet from standing on concrete for 9 hrs a day around no one that speaks english but yet i've been up every morning at 4 am for work. This morning I had to push myself but I think thats cuz I knew it was Friday.
He did start the whole boy scout thing this week. During summer they only have meetings every other week so thats nice. At least they are in the evening hours and it will give him a chance to be around other boys his age. He has 1 missing tooth right now and the one next to it is ready to come out plus one of the top front teeth is a little lose soon he's going to look a little silly if he looses all 4 of the very front teeth without the big ones comeing in lol. Well I think that's all i got for today. I need to head off to bn.com to see if they have any new Murder She Wrote books in so i can try to get one for mom since her bday is next month. Maybe I'll have more another week.

Being female sucks

Ok yes I hate PMS more than anything in the world. At this moment in time i think childbirth natural without drugs sounds like more fun than bleeding for what feels like forever. I am supposed to be hanging out the a couple of friends this weekend since im the DD what a wonderful job let me tell u NOT. I'd rather be the one drinking and let one of the boys stay sober but no whatever Im just a good friend since one of them is only home on leave for a week before heading off to go overseas the only reason we are really going out this weekend anyways. Which means I get to stay the night with the man of my dreams even though we are not together but like i really care. He's mine no other little bitch is gonna touch him cuz i'll beat her little face in and well he's already said no one better mess with me but yet he dont want a commitment so whatever. I really cant say we are together but yet we aint seein anyone else its kind of complicated but i wouldnt trade it for the world. I go back to work finally on Monday at 6:30am can't freakin wait the bad part is my son has his first Tiger cub scout metting that night at 6:30 so not only do i have to work and bust my ass for 9 hours then i get to turn around and climb 3 flights of stairs to be in the same room with a bunch of little brats lol oh well it will be good for him. They have a camping trip in July so mommy gets to buy a tent and learn how to set it up there better be some damn pictures to go with this tent otherwise it might not get put up lol. Now I get why people say i need to settle down and get married so the guy can go and do this stuff with Kris. Oh well if i can fix the vaccum cleaner on my own without the instructions surly i can read the instructions and figure out how to put the damn tent together we'll see that should be very interesting let me tell you. Hopefully when im trying mom wont be anywhere near with the cam cuz that would be wrong lol. Today really seems like my day to bitch. I love this guy more than i thought i could ever love any guy and things are good the way they are cuz we are both trying to make our lives good that way if we decide in the near future to settle down then we'll be ok and not having to struggle as hard as we are now and with Kris having adhd he's afraid to get too involved with me incase it doesnt work out he doesnt want to slow down the progress that Kris has done so far which is good that he is thinkin that way but i do wish i could see him more. My friend has started seeing someone recently now shes blowing me off for him and then the one night we are supposed to hang out just the two of us she calls to tell me im bring jeffy with me wtf of course im pmsing and trying to be calm so i said whatever but thats bull shit i dont want to see two people makeout all night when i already feel like crap when i cant even talk or see mine till this weekend because he's spending this week with Gabe (which i support 110%) because we dont know if Gabe will come back or not cuz he's on the front line so im a little worried about that cuz he's an amazing guy and a great friend and I know how close him and Tim are and if something were to happen i really dont know how tim would handle it. When Tim's brother went overseas back in Nov. he pushed me away cuz he was afraid of everything but Gabe has tried to help him see that pushing me away isn't going to help anything that im an amazing girl and he should see what he has in front of him before its too late and a bunch of other stuff im not sure if i believe it or not sometimes but oh well. I do hope Tim gets his head out of his ass soon that way he can see that im not here to hurt him that i support him in every way. Ok now that i've bitched for a little while im going to go lay down for a little bit my back hurts and I hate cramps. MEN SHOULD HAVE PERIODS NOT WOMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I dunno

Yea today is Sat. joy joy Kris has 3 day weekend and we aint doin nada no money to really do anything. Took a walk today from my house to the TPA park it sounded like fun gave Kris something to do. WE took the dog no big deal she likes going for walks. We get all the way to the park then he complains my feet hurt the playground is too hot oh then the nice little stand opens that sells the drinks so it was "mommy i want" well mommy has no money hello big red truck. So he throws a fit and we head home the whole way home is bitchin its hot my feet hurt blah blah blah. Then we get home great or so I thought I plugged my fan in and it didnt want to work at first i wasnt happy. I'm really hoping today gets better if not im going to scream. Oh and to top things off rent a center knows we dont go to pay until afternoon after 3 and do they care no they want to try to call me at 10 fucking o'clock in the morning to tell me i need to pay hello i'm not late till after they close DUH! Ok i'm going to go lay down now and watch tv and get fat well ok not the fat part but u know. Later

Really do not understand the male population

U know i've tried to figure them out and they dont make any sense to me. All my guy friends keep saying guys are so much easier to understand than the female population I do not believe that. For example I have fallen for a guy who to me is wonderful except right now cuz god only knows what has crawled up his ass. We've known each other for 11 yrs and have been on and off for 3 1/2 yrs. I go to bed thinking about him. Things were going really good we spend about 3 weekends in a row together mainly cuz 2 of those i was the DD cuz his best friend was leaving for military. Then I made dinner and took him food on Wed 2 days before his bday gave him a movie, and a 6 pack of MGD plus the card. Then i sent him a text friday early early early morning to tell him happy bday and he said thnx since then I have not heard from him. I had sent a text on Sat. to see if he wanted to hang out sometime this week no reply. Wed. was better than i thought it would be. Normally he sits on one side of the room and i sit on the other side but this time we sat next to each other the whole night and then when it was nite time he actually carried me into the bedroom which was a first. I woke up the next morning with him still holding on to me and thats not like him so why the hell is he being a dick now? Everytime I think i'm getting closer to him he pushes me away like this and i dont know what to do. I dont really want a relationship right now i like what we have going on it is what it is i cant explain it. But i love the fun we have. I can actually be me and not have to worry about talking to someone and him getting mad. We made a promise that if either of us wanted to see someone we would tell the other person and we've been real good about keeping that i just want to know if hes acting this way cuz there is someone he wants i dont know im so tired of trying to figure him out.

IT'S ALL WHATEVER

So yes that's my new motto just because well i got it from my good friend Gabe who better come back to us all in one damn piece and alive. He just left on Monday he'll be gone for 20 months. I'm not sure what Tim is going to do with himself cuz that's his best friend I guess that just means i'll have to go over and see him more often (i really wont mind). Kris had his first eye appt today and well lets just say in 10 business days he will have his own glasses. He picked out his frames today they are blue go figure. I am going with my best friend (Alisha) tomorrow to see about CNA classes i'm tired of not working and not having any money then tomorrow night I'm going over to Tim's making him dinner and watching a movie his b-day is this friday and i wont be able to see him because of my mom schedual but that's ok i'm making up for it he gets dinner tomorrow and Thurs. from me. Plus i'll prob. get him some beer for his b-day with the money that I have saved up and earned. Other than that not a lot going on. I think things between him and i are finally starting to look official. I mean hell in the last 3 1/2 years he has only kissed one other girl. I'm the only one he's ever had sleeping in his bed and his best friend keeps calling me his old lady and he doesn't correct them so maybe i'm finally getting lucky. Well i'm out of here for now i got some things to get done real quick have a wonderful week.

Almost the end

So it's almost the end of april. I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not. Kris still has all of may and a few days in June before school is out for him then i think they are going to put him in summer school. They changed his meds again. He's became very aggressive lately they put him on a new schedual he now only goes to school till 11:30. The docs says the next step is rehibilitation i'm not sure i like that or not but if thats what it has to be then it has to be cuz he dont need to go around hitting people for no reason. Tonight i'm getting ready to go out with a couple guy friends i get to be the wonderful DD joy joy. I guess they should feel lucky that i am not a big drinker lol. The only reason they are going out is cuz one of them will be shipping out in a couple weeks in fact next weekend is his last full weekend home and i think they are planning on going to the Titty bar that night but who knows. Not much else is going on. Just the same old same. Well i guess i should prob. get dressed and start thinking about how i'm going to do my hair i mean come on you know us girls it will take us at least 5 hours to get ready LOL I"m not that bad I promise

EEG news

Ok so we went and talked to the peditrician today about the test results from his EEG. and the test results showed nothing was wrong. My question is then why is he blacking out??????? We were supposed to have a case conference friday but got a paper today saying it was cancelled but they didn't say why just that it would be reschedualed but for who knows when. Which is ok i guess but hello what about those of us who are trying to find a job i can't wait till the last mintue to schedual a damn meeting... oh well... Other than that not much else is planned for this week which is good cuz it gives me time to plan my Sat. night plans out a little bit more man oh man is HE ever going to have a wonderful surprise maybe i'll go buy a pair of fishnet stockings to go with my mini skirt:) maybe he might like it too much though. well have a good week

Easter Weekend

Wow this year is really going fast. It's already almost easter yeppiiii..... Nothing major planned this weekend. Took Kris easter egg hunting today fun fun IT WAS FUCKING FREEZEING!!!!!!!!! mental note do not believe the weather man when he says its 60 degrees cuz in reality it was only 45 degrees and i'm outside in capri's and sandles omg talk about toes being frozen. The place we went was horriable the damn adults need to stay the hell out of the way and let the kids pick up the damn candy themselves. I hate parents who go out in the field with their child especiall the age group that Kris was in. Got to take mom back into work here in a few mins so she can get the cakes done for tomorrow so she doesn't have to work tomorrow. Then hopefully later tonight I'll be hangin with someone special who means a lot to me. Then tomorrow coming home who knows when to do the whole easter egg hunt and easter basket with the kid. This next week is going to be a little busy. We go to see the doc on Tues. to get results from the EEG!!! then we have a case conference at school on Friday joy joy. Well gonna bounce need to shave my legs and fix my makeup so i at least look a little hot lol

Stay up all night

Ok so tomorrow we take Kris to Kokomo to the Howard County Hospital to get his EEG done just happens to be the place that the doc. is that medicaid will cover for the test bunch of bs but hey i'll do whatever i need to do. Tonight however is going to suck major ass. We have to keep him up all night. that way at 10 am tomorrow morning he is tired enough to go to sleep to have the test done. That is going to be so hard especially on the way to Kokomo tomorrow since he usually falls asleep when we drive to Lafayette at Kokomo is just as far if not farther to get to the hospital. I just hope they figure out what is going on. Oh the other wonderful thing this week is they did the food allergy test and he's not allergic to any food. He did however have problems at school yesterday he was trying to hit his helper and hit another child instead in the chest so today he was suspended he could go back tomorrow however he's not going to since we have the appt at 10 in the morning and he'll be cranky so he'll go back to school on Monday joy joy let me tell you. They better figure out soon what is going on because i dont know how much more i can take of him acting the way he does. they say not to spank your child but i'm to the point now that i dont care he needs a good ass beaten maybe that will get it through his head. I've tried everything. takeing things away, not letting him do fun things really what more do i need to do. Damn i could use a drink right about now URG... well i'm off so i can figure out something to do with him to stay awake i'll post later.

Update about Kris

Ok so we got the refferal for the EEG for Kris. It will be done on April 3rd at 10 am. Its for sleep deprevation so he'll have to stay up the night before all night so that by 10 am he's ready to fall asleep sounds like a lot of fun NOT. But at least they are getting it done. I wont know anything else until then or some time after that. The down side is he misses a full day of school and spring pictures at school and that night they are having a movie night for the kids at school he'll be way too tired to go. But it needs done. Right now he's on spring break Wed. we will be heading down to Indy for a trip to the children's museum. He's so excited. Well i'm off to get dinner started and see if i can get the dishes done and maybe get the laundry started.

very quick update

so we had our case conference on friday basically they are wondering if there is more than ADHD going on with Kris. So the therapist is going to talk to the doctor and see if it is possible to get him down for a neurological test. we've tried 4 different meds so far and we are starting to run out of options with everything. We go to see the doc. and the therapist the same day (Thursday) So MAYBE i will know more then. Other than that we have nothing going on this week. basically just another week. Well got to go get dinner started. Have a good week.

just another day

This week has been so long i just wish it was over. Right now i'm really glad i'm not working. I've been at the school every day this week to pick him up early because of complications. We have our case conference tomorrow with the school and his therapist but i dont know how much good thats going to do because his therapist is an ass. He just keeps telling me i'm doing something wrong because he doesn't see the behavior that kris shows at school at home well no fucking shit dumbass you take him to the play room and he gets to fucking play theres not other kids in there. His therapist keeps saying he's going to go to school and observe hasn't done that yet. The assistant principle is getting fed up with the therapist because she wants him to come and see what kris is like at school. I know he's not a bad kid and everyone else keeps telling me its not my fault but i feel like it is. We all think there is more than ADHD going on but no one listens to me i mean come on i'm a young single mom with no college degree. Who's going to believe me or even take time to listen to what i have to say no one. maybe i did mess things all up and i didnt mean to. i really don't know how to fix him or help him anymore than i am. i feel like i keep hitting a brick wall. then i have people riding my ass because i have no desire to get out and date and settle down well no fucking shit who's going to want a single mom who has a child with adhd and acts like he does sometimes. He's kinda been blacking out at school and will push the table around the room and then finally come back and not remember doing it at all. that's not a good sign. Well i guess i'm bitched enough and should probably go see what i'm going to fix for dinner tonight and see if he's going to help me to earn money to get the legos he wants.

been a week

So we have now had our wonderful puppy for a week. This week has kind of blown by. The down side is that i've been so busy trying to get everything up and going and trying to potty train princess that I let my exercise routine go for the week which isn't good. I bought a new swimsuite a couple of weeks ago (ok i look horrible in it right now cuz i'm FAT) it's so cute i love it. Now i just got to lose the weight so that it will look hot on me:) Kris has adjusted to the puppy very nicely they play before and after school everyday. He was able to take her to Petsmart on Friday and got her a new toy, a shirt, and a name tag. He thought he was a big boy. Well I guess I better get going I still have a lot to get done. Need to put a business website together just really don't know where to start at the moment i'm sure i can figure it out sometime. Have a great week to all

Monday is almost over

Ok so today has not been a very good day at all. I had an appt. to get my hair permed and the lady yesterday told me my hair was long enough for the spiral. Well she ended up not being there today and when we went in the lady that was there was very rude and told me that only hair that is half way down your back can be spiral. So i said screw it. Went over to walmart to pick up my BC which got done earlier than they had said it would made me kinda happy other than i had to spend $60 for it oh well. Went to get mom a couple of shirts they didn't have any that she wanted no big deal. Got home to check my unemployment and it said i was denied for this week. I freaked out and wanted to know why. After about an hour on the phone on hold found out that it was cuz the computer had a glitch over the weekend and should have my money tomorrow. Well i had also taken the trash out this morning oh yea they didn't run nice to know that after hauling it all out there. The truck needs spark plugs finally got ahold of the machanic he will be changing those on Wed. Oh and the fridgerator BROKE!!!!!!! Travis (our landlord) wont be by till Wed. Thank goodness we have the small fridge. Oh and kris had a bad day at school. Its been a battle to get his meds down him the last few days so that's prob. why he's having a bad day. But to make my day brighter we have 6 days till we pick our wonderful new puppy up. Kris is all happy about it. Its a boston Terrier/ Beagle mix. She's so cute. She will be 8 weeks old on Sunday and we will be picking her up on Sunday. It's about a 3 hour drive one way. But thats ok. His therapist thinks it might help him more than we think so we'll see. I'm going to try to post the pic on here I hope it works. Well ok i've bitched enough I guess. OH yea i got my tax check and well got a lot of stuff that we needed and some things we didn't The wii fit is cool. Well have a nice week

Below Zero

Ok so for the last two days now the kids have been out of school due to weather. I don't remember it being this cold the past few years. A lot of damn snow on the ground YUCK!!!! oh and to top it off its been below zero here. It prob. wouldn't be so bad but half the heaters in this house doesn't work. at least we have a space heater. the windows in my room suck because the wind just blows right through them so last night Kris and I had a sleep over party in the living room where the space heater is:) He was happy that he didnt have to go to school yesterday or today. We still had to leave the house however he had the doc. appt for his meds yesterday and goes to see Dan (therapist) today. But other than that its all been about trying to stay warm. He kicked mine and my friends butt in monopoly yesterday (he is really good at it on the wii, computer and board game) so i think later today after we get back we might play the wii and bowl for a little while to warm up a little bit. Mom has been playing a little on the wii even though she hates playing games. But she likes to bowl so kris has talked her into playing a little. Other than that i think thats all that is going on right now. I think i'm going to go back to the living room where its warmer.

Another week of fustration

Ok so this week is starting off real bad. Yesterday was Sunday and that's the day i file my weekly claim on unemployment I still have 10 weeks left of it however when i logged on yesterday there was no link that said "file weekly claim" only "homepage", and "file new claim" well mom got on looking to see if she could figure out what was going on and went to a total different page and clicked on file new claim well since i was still logged on that started a whole new claim for me so i have to wait till after 8 this morning to call them and well last week when it didn't show that i was approved i tried calling and it was busy finally it went through online to show i was getting paid. Its just a freakin pain in the ass. At least mom will be home in time to put kris on the bus so i can stay in here trying to call them and deal with their crap. I just hope i can get through this morning.

Ok anyways i saw something yesterday while we were in Lafayette that kind of made me laugh. It was a sticker on an older guys truck it said: M.Y.O.F.B. which stand for mind your own fucking business.

Back to school

So Kris went back to school yesterday he was so excited in the morning. From what i can tell he did pretty well going back to school. He brougt home 3 sad faces on his paper but they happened about the time area that meds were starting to wear off. other than that not a lot went on. I went to walmart yesterday JUST to walk around. Today mom has somethings she has to go get done while he's at school so i'm giong to tag along with her cuz its better than sitting around the house and getting fat. well i got to get the kid fed and dressed later

A New Year

Ok so yea I know this is like what 2 days past new years or something like that. Well we didn't have internet connection on New Years day which was really no big deal i just laid around all day thinking about things. Well I don't really believe in new years resolutions because well everyone seems to always break them mainly because they set them where they are not realistically able to complete like falling for mr. right. YEAH RIGHT that takes time duh. But I did set one for this year but i've also set goal stages to do the main one. My New Years Eve I will be in my 7's no questions asked. I don't really have that far to go but I'm very determined plus i set it so that I lose so much each month. Not counting putting a picture in my room to help. I figure if i can lose about 15lbs by my birthday (or more) then i'll treat myself to getting my nails done or go tanning. Then if i can lose at least another 10 by time Kris finishes school in June I'll go shopping and buy 1 new outfit. Small goals and small steps but I will get there. Plus my other one is to get a job ok that shouldn't be too hard if i get desperate i could always go to fast food but i'm trying not to! There's been no point up to now to look for a job because it was holiday time. But Kris goes back to school on Monday and well i'm tired of being at home all the time. We did go and see a movie yesterday mom to us to see Me & Marele it was pretty cute until the end and then it was sad:(. I want to go see Bloody Valentine when it comes out cuz its 3-D but got to see if one of my guy friends will go cuz its supposed to be scary. Kris is so ready to go back to school on monday. He wanted to go back the day after Christmas he doesn't really understand he gets 2 weeks off for the holidays. But i'm glad he loves school so much he wants to go back. Other than that theres not a lot going on. We have a case conference at school next friday for Kris so that should be a lot of fun NOT. I hate those things they are so boring its all repeat stuff. Kris does however wants to learn Karate i'm not sure if thats such a good idea but sure why not maybe it will teach him disapline. I have noticed lately that his hands shake more than what they should so i got to call his doc. this week and see about getting him in to find out what is going on. I'm not sure if its the meds he's on or if maybe he's going to be diabetic because usually if he eats something they stop again so i'm not sure what is going on. Plus got to find him a dentest to go see oh boy he's going to love that NOT. No lose tooth yet at all. He still has all of his baby teeth as of right now. Well I guess i better get going so he can get on the computer he's been complaining for at least 20 mins. that i'm taking too long checking my mail opps. lol