Finally it's over

Ok So yea Christmas is finally over i know that's bad that i'm excited its over. Now this weekend it will be bye bye to the tree till next year :) Kris seemed to have a pretty good christmas. He got 3 0r 4 Bakugan books (maybe now he'll work on his reading more so he can read them haha) he got a long sleeve Bakugan Shirt he's so happy about that. a new thing to play bakugan on along with some balls. My friend Alisha got him Bakugan cards man was he ever happy which made her feel really good because her little sister hurt her feeling. She had bought her little sister a couple different things nothing major really didn't have a lot of money to spend on everyone which i understand that feeling we told her not to worry about getting Kris something but she says she can't leave her little man out but anyways when her sister opened the gifts from her she went through them like "have it" or "don't have it" then after that said "is that all" ok mind you she is a year younger than Kris. Kris has never acted like that. He takes what he gets and is very thankful for them which is good. We tricked him and had hidden all the presents and left only 1 out and told him that santa must have thought he wasn't very good this year. The only thing he did was open it and said that's ok mommy i love what he brought me i was amazed. I would have been yeah right where the hell is the rest of them lol. I got all my christmas presents early (only cuz i picked them out haha) I got the CSI game for the DS LOVE IT!!! CSI is the best:) I also got a new Blender (yes that's sad it was on my christmas list for one of those and a new vaccum how sad is that) and I got a new mp3 player (it was under $40 at best buy when we got it and its a 4GB the 2GB was about $60 hmm let me think about that one. No I don't like the actual Ipods they are way too expensive) Oh and Alisha got me a CSI book:) plus some crossword puzzle books so now i have things to keep me busy lol. I feel bad cuz Kris and I have yet to go get family pictures done in about 2 years now. Maybe we'll go the Sunday before he goes back to school. He's getting a hair cut on Sunday he just don't know it yet haha. Well i'm off to finish cleaning the kitchen I"ve been working on scrubbing the floor off and on all day lol

Later

New week

So today is a new week and last week i was cleared by the doc to go back to any routine. I also got on the pill (YAZ) i got a free sample from his office last week and today i go to pick up my prescribtion from the pharmacy can't wait to see how much that's gonna cost me. My friend got on the pill the same day (but something else) and its about $40 a month why the hell is birth control so expensive damn. I mean condoms are somewhat cheaper depending on how many times you have to buy them. But at least with birth control pill it will help regulate periods and your moods which is a good thing i think. Today i started a new diet and routine. Get up about a half hour before Kris to get a small workout done (mainly crunches belly needs to go bye bye) then after he leaves for school i'm free to get anything else done. So far today its been pretty productive. washed my bed sheets and remade the bed took a shower and did my makeup got ready to go to the store as soon as mom gets home from work which she should be soon i hope. I had a full bottle of water and two oranges this morning for breakfast which should be better than the sugar bear ceral i wanted to have. I just know i have to force myself to stay on the diet this time because i'm tired of having this damn belly since Kris was born. I feel confident today i just hope the feeling stays. tomorrows plans are to get the kitchen floor clean and mopped and maybe get the toys all picked up so i can vaccum but i kind of want to go to lafayette to workone and see what kind of jobs they have. well gotta get going so i can get some stuff done. Have a great week:)

One week later

Ok so its been a week since the miscarriage yes i'm feeling a little better. I go in tomorrow to see the doc for the follow up visit from the D&C see what he has to say and find out if i have any more restrictions and if so for how long. I am ready to start a diet and fitness plan to get rid of unwanted weight around the tummy area. It seems like since Kris was born i've been fighting with that forever ok its mainly because he was a c-section baby. My goal is to be back down to about 120 before my 26th b-day doesn't leave me much time but right now i have a lot of free time so i'm sure i can do it. Plus after the first of the year its job hunting again. There's no point in looking too hard right now because hello its winter not many people are hiring. I'm going to shoot for an office job. Maybe next summer i'll start taking some classes again and get my degree in either office administration or medical billing and coding either one seems to always be in demand and the pay is pretty good (better than working in a factory) My big goal is to not go back to Zachary's next year. i know i can do so much better than that. As far as the male population they are the least of my concern right now. If Mr. Right happens to show up then good if not oh well. Maybe he will some day but to be honest i'm not holding my breath right now its so not worth it. Kris stayed home sick today so that ruined my whole thought of going x-mas shopping for him but i still have a couple weeks before winter break. I only have a couple things left i just wanted to get it done and over with. Well i think should prob. get going and head off to bed he gets up too early and i have to pack his lunch still and take a shower in the morning before my doc. appt hope they dont want to prode and poke me YUCK!

Update

So today is the day before Thanksgiving its about 9pm here in good old Indiana. I am supposed to be resting according to doctors orders but since when do i ever listen to anyone. A lot has happened this week and I have yet to take the time to deal with any of it. Tomorrow its just mom, me and Kris sitting around house watching tv maybe Kris and I will play monolopy or something together as a family. We are just having ham because Kris says we are not allowed to eat Turkey since we ate his best friend last year (he rode home with the turkey in the backseat last year and it became his best friend kids will be kids) This week i learned that no matter if you do everything right God has his own plan and things happen for a reason. I spent most of my day Tuesday at the ER here in Frankfort and had to have a D&C (i think thats what it is called) as of about 5am yesterday morning I lost the baby. I dont know why or how. I swear i did everything right. I didnt smoke, drink or lift heavy objects I took it easy got lots of rest took my prenatals and everything. I swear if one more person hugs me and tells me it will be ok i'm going to explode. I've held it all together I have yet to break down and cry over all this because I have to be the strong one. Kris took it really hard he was so excited about having a brother or sister. I'm just scared what this mean. Am I ever going to be able to have any more kids??? I mean I dont want to do it all alone but I dont want to be 30 before I have another one. This year is almost over maybe next year will be better or at least I can hope right. Well i guess those who thought i was the black sheep of the family and a total fuck up is correct because i cant even carry a baby full term without loseing it so i hope you are all happy. With that said have a happy thanksgiving.

Update

Ok i don't get on here much to write well the internet was down for about a week between the interent company having issues and the computer wanting to be a pain in the ass. Anyways not a lot going on here these days. I got laid off on friday i knew it was coming so it was no big deal now i get to spend more time with kris and stuff. Need to go through all those damn toys and get rid of some before Christmas. I think he is mainly getting board games and games for the DS and Wii. Still waiting on medicaid to send me my paperwork so i can make my first doc. appt. Tonight on CMT they had the movie Beer for my horses It comes out on DVD On Tues. It is an awesome movie i recommend it. Not many movies here lately have kept my interest but i sat and watched all of it tonight. Kris brought home 11 3's on his report card and 10 2's the 3's stand for meeting standards and the 2's means close to meeting standards compared to last year he's doing really good. He's all excited about the baby and is always wanting to rub the belly cuz he thinks the baby can feel him right now you know how kids are. well need to get off to bed so i can get up with him and get him off to school night everyone

Urrg Men

I'M SO FED UP WITH THE MALE POPULATION. HOW THE HELL CAN YOU SIT THERE AND SAY IT CAN'T BE YOURS WHEN YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE I'VE BEEN WITH. OK YES YOU MIGHT HAVE PULLED OUT BUT HELLO ITS CALLED PRE-CUM YOU FUCKING RETARD. I SWEAR TO GOD HOW FUCKED UP IN THE HEAD CAN A GUY REALLY BE. I GUESS HE'LL FIND OUT IN 9 MONTHS THAT I'M NOT FUCKING PLAYING GAMES. I WENT ON TUESDAY TO THE DOC. TO GET A TEST TO PROVE TO MEDICAID THAT I WAS PREGO. THEY WERE ABLE TO DO A HORMONE TEST AND I'M ABOUT 2 WEEKS WHICH HELLO YOU RETARD THAT WOULD HAVE TO MAKE IT YOURS DUMBASS. SORRY NOT TRYING TO GO ON AND ON BUT HE REALLY PISSED ME OFF TODAY AND I CAN'T SAY THIS TO HIS FACE CUZ HE DONT WANT THE DRAMA AT WORK WHICH IS FINE I CAN UNDERSTAND THAT BC I DONT WANT THE DAMN DRAMA AT WORK EITHER. URRRGGGG HE WONT TALK TO ME BUT HE HAS NO PROB. TALKING TO MY FRIENDS ABOUT SHIT AND WANTING TO KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON BUT YET HE CAN'T PICK UP THE PHONE AND ASK ME THE ONE WHO REALLY IS CARRING THE BABY URGGG. SO I TOLD THEM NOT TO TELL HIM A DAMN THING AND THAT IF HE WANTS TO KNOW THEN HE NEEDS TO JUST CALL ME AND DEAL WITH ME OR HE CAN GO FUCK HIMSELF AND BE LEFT IN THE DARK. SORRY IF THAT MAKES ME A BITCH THEN SO BE IT.

How do I tel you

SO I HAVE FOUND SOMETHING OUT IN THE LAST 24 HOURS AND I'M NOT SURE HOW TO TELL ANYONE. CHESTER AND I DID BREAK UP ON THURSDAY NOTHIN MAJOR I GUESS HE SAID I WAS BEIN TOO BITCHY THIS PAST WEEKEND AND WELL KIND OF FOUND OUT WHY JUST NOW SURE HOW TO HANDLE IT. I REALIZED AROUND WED. SOMETHING WASN'T RIGHT I THOUGHT MAYBE IT WAS JUST PMS AND THAT'S WHY I HAD BEEN ACTING LIKE A BITCH WELL IT SOUNDED ABOUT RIGHT. CUZ IT SHOULD HAVE STARTED THURSDAY. HOWEVER IT DIDN'T I TOOK A TEST AND REALLY DON'T LIKE THE RESULTS. HE INSISTES IT CAN'T BE HIS AND WANTS TO WAIT AND SEE BUT WHATEVER TYPICAL GUY RIGHT. YES I UNDERSTAND WHERE HE IS COMING FROM CUZ I WAS SORT OF SEEIN SOMEONE ABOUT A WEEK BEFORE HIM BUT IT DIDN'T WORK OUT BECAUSE OF MANY REASONS AND WE BOTH SAID IT WOULD BE BETTER TO BE FRIENDS SO WHO KNOWS. ACCORDING TO SOME RESEARCH THAT I HAVE DONE MY BEST OVULATION TIME WOULD HAVE BEEN 9/12-9/17 WHICH WOULD PUT THE OVULATION DAY AT 9/15 WHICH IS THE DAY THINGS STARTED WITH CHESTER SO I DONT KNOW. I HAVE AN APPT ON TUESDAY AT 6PM AT A FREE PLACE HERE IN TOWN SO I DONT KNOW. I CAN'T TELL MY MOM YET NOT TILL I KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON. I CAN'T DO THIS ALONE I REALLY DON'T THINK I WANT TO. GOD I HAVE TO BE THE STUPIDEST PERSON IN THE WORLD TO ALWAYS FALL FOR THE FUCKIN LINES GUYS GIVE AND SHIT. MY BEST FRIEND IS THE ONE I TOLD FIRST AND THE ONLY THING SHE SAYS IS IT WILL BE OK ITS LIKE NO ONE UNDERSTANDS WHAT IT IS LIKE I DONT WANT TO GO THROUGH RAISING ANOTHER ONE ALONE. WHO IS GOING TO EVER WANT SOMEONE WITH TWO KIDS FROM DIFFERENT GUYS. MY FINGERS ARE CROSSED THAT THE TEST LIED BUT I HAVE A FEELING THATS NOT GOING TO BE THE CASE. CHESTER INSISTS IT CAN'T BE HIS BECAUSE WE DIDN'T DO ANYTHING TILL THE 15TH OF SEPT. AND ALL WEEK LONG LAST WEEK EVERY DAY AT LEAST ONCE A DAY BUT HE SAYS THERE IS NO WAY THE TEST WOULD COME BACK POSITIVE YET. I JUST WONDER WHAT HE WOULD DO IF IT TURNS OUT TO BE HIS. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW POSSIBLE IT WOULD BE FOR IT TO BE HIS RIGHT NOW. THE ONLY THING I WANT TO DO IS CRY AND I CAN'T DO THAT CUZ I CAN'T LET ANYONE KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON I HAVE TO CARRY ON LIKE THERE IS NOTHING WRONG LIKE EVERYTHING IS FINE AND THAT I'M JUST PMSING UNTIL I KNOW FOR SURE. I AM SORRY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY SORRY

Update of a long week

So yea where to begin???? Well for starters I started seeing this wonderful amazing guy. His name is Chester. He's been real good with Kris all week which is helping so much. Kris got in a lot of trouble at school Monday cuz his meds didnt work or somethin. But now he only goes half day for who knows who. He also told them he was itchy cuz we have bugs in the house which we do not so therefore CPS got called and I've been stressed all week. Even though i'm sure there are days that i've been a real bitch he has put up with me no matter my moods surprise surprise right. We had a meeting at school today to talk about what to do and right now they are going to keep him at half day and slowly work on getting him to go all day. Other than that right now I think thats about it oh yea by the way CPS said they found nothing wrong with the place. As of right now I think that's about it. Well i'm off of here to go spend the rest of the evening with my boyfriend and his daughter and my son its so nice.

For you Ralph

There isn't a guy involved right now Chris is JUST A FRIEND who owns the bike that's it nothing more. There is however a guy that I am interested in at work and come to find out he likes me but who knows if that will go anywhere I have very bad luck with guys. As far as getting on the bike I'm sorry Stuart but I will probably do it at least one more time this year you gotta understand its a thrill for me its like getting high for those who do drugs not me because well i am the good child :P Anyways i'm kind of seeing this guy from work Friday night him and a friend and her bf is coming over (she's my friend not his lol) so we are going to have a couples date in i'm making dinner and she says she's going to help so it should be fun i hope. Right now i'm just taking it all one day at a time and not rushing into anything. I'll keep you posted on what goes on. have a good week

Already Sept. What happened

Ok so today is the 8th day of Sept. Where did Aug go????? There's not a lot going on around here at the moment. Kris has gone back to school and so far so good. He had a prob. the first day of school he didnt want to ride the bus home but other than that everything is going good now. He has a paraperfessional (sorry about spelling) that helps him during class plus he is on Vyvanse for ADHD. They have him on a pill at night to help him sleep however IT DOESN'T WORK!!!!! He goes back next week to see the doc for his prescription so hopefully we can get something new to help him sleep. I work my usual 42 hours a week lots of fun NOT. Today was kind of a slow day i was on a slow line it was a nice minivacation from where I am normally at but i'm ready to go back to the faster lines. At this time I'm not seeing anyone I know thats a surprise right NOT. In the last week I have gotten to ride a motorcycle twice. IT WAS AWESOME I can't wait to ride again when the wheather is nice again it is supposed to rain all week plus Chris (my guy friend) works 2nd shift at SIA So the only time i get to do that is on the weekends. He is supposed to come down in a few weeks to give my truck a tune up however which will be nice cuz it needs one badly. Other than that nothing amazing is going on in my life. I'm just taking things one day at a time hopeing for the best but in the end isn't that all we can really do. Kris doesn't go back to see his Therapist till the 8th of Oct. now so that's like a month away kind of nice see how he does with that. Dan (his therapist) would like the school to test him to see how smart he really is but who knows if they will. Well I'll try to write more when i have time and when i have more to update everyone with. Hopefully after his B-day there will be new pics i can put some on here and there will be lots on my myspace page.

Hump Day:)

Ok so this is mainly for my brother since he is complaining about me not posting much on here lol... The main reason I haven't is because there really isn't much to talk about right now. I haven't rented any movies lately and nothing major is going on in my life go figure right. Still living the single life raising a hyper 6 year old little boy and working. I did however find out a good guy friend of mine is leaving in Oct for 18 months for school down in FL. I"m happy for him but at the same time sad. You really have to know and understand the whole thing to fully understand why i really dont want him to go. We have been on and off for 3 years most of which has just been GREAT AMAZING s--. I know you dont want to hear about it so i wont tell you lol.... That's just it we are just friends with benefits which has worked out great this year in the long run cuz i really haven't had time for a full relationship but i spend a lot of Sat. nights with him. Here lately its been Every Sat night for about a month. Last weekend we just sat around his house watching a movie. Its nice to have someone who understands you and doesn't want you to be something your not. But it hurts to wake up next to that person Sunday morning and know that you aren't supposed to love him even though both of you know you do. Things with him is so ful of passion but he keeps insisting its just what it is there is no feelings there and stuff but i'm sorry the way he acts and stuff speaks differently than his words. Maybe this isn't making sense to anyone but i dont care. When I am with him i'm not afraid to be myself. I like falling asleep next to him usually i get up before him so i slip out while he's asleep which he likes but one day maybe i'll surpise him. I know when he leaves that will be the end of whatever you want to call this. Maybe its just us being young and dumb hell i dont know. I just know i'm going to miss him but just like everyone else that has walked out of my life i'll get over it and move on. The best part about him is we have an understand that he wont meet my son. Yes I talk about the little one and he listens and gives advice just like any friend but as far as letting him get to know my son there is no way in hell. Sat. nights are mine when they happen and my mom watches Kris. I just dont want Kris to get attached to someone who is going to turn around and leave right away. Ok well I guess I better stop going on and on about it and get ready to leave so I can go to work YUCK! We've been packing cherrys this week but the last 3 weeks has been mints. I'm kind of glad to be packing something different. I'll write more after registration next week unless something major comes up.

It's the weekend

Ok so its been a little while since i've been on here to leave a blog. Things are going pretty well. I am enjoying my job for the most part it has its moments just like any other. Right now I am looking for another job but not in the state of Indiana. My mom had a biopsy (sorry if misspelled) lately on her breasts cuz they saw a few spots that looked abnormal. Good news is that its not cancer its just a blockage of a duct or somethin like that like i really pay attention as long as its not cancer. Kris is doing good on his meds it has made a really big difference which is really good. other than that everything else is the same as always. I go to work and come home nothing new in my life. Just going through things here at home and getting rid of stuff trying to figure out what i can sell and what i cant and stuff. I figure either come Dec. or June we'll be out of here depends on how things go on the job hunt and at my current job cuz i know lay off is around Oct or Nov or maybe get lucky and last till Dec. I'll keep everyone posted

Happy 4th of July

Ok so today is a holiday big deal. Did some fireworks with the kid other than that did nothing. I had the day off from work which was really nice. However I should have gotten housework and stuff done and well I didnt. My mom is wanting to have a yard sale soon and get rid of the stuff we aren't using or wanting which makes sense to me but that would require me going through stuff. There's always tomorrow. Kris is doing good since they put him on his medicine. WOW its a BIG difference. hell now i can out eat him where before it was the other way around lol. My mom goes in on monday to have a biopsey (sorry if misspelled) on her breast they found some spots that could or could not be cancer. I'm hoping for no cancer she's already gave me one scare this year already i dont need another one. Other than that just a lot on my mind. She's into this whole kick of either being closer to my family or finding someone and setteling down that way if and when something happens to her i wont be alone which is in some ways makes sense but lets face it no guy wants me i'm never good enough for anyone and well most of my family doesn't speak to me anymore so what the hell does it matter. well i'm going to go so i can go watch a movie and go to bed yes early on July 4th and no alochol gee we have a prob.

Not monday again

Ok so yes its monday however its almost over think god. I quit my job recently at the milkyway i got tired of working nights all the freakin time and weekend i never got to do anything with my son or my friends which really sucked ok i'm cool with not hanging out with my friends because i dont have many these days anyways but i missed spending time with my son. I went back to Zachary's since they called back it is so worth it major holidays off till lay off time and weekends off yea i like that idea. The doc put my son on vyvanse this past week for ADHD so far its ok i guess. Right now i'm just trying to make it through one day at a time with him and with my mom and life in general. Have you ever had one of those days that you just stop and ask what did you do wrong and when did you do it??? yea I thought about that last night after I put the kid to bed and curled up to watch some tv before bed where did i go wrong and how the hell did i fuck up so many relationships was it me or was it them. I guess this whole going to bed alone every night is starting to get to me plus everyone around me seems to think i need to settle down screw that I'm only 25 I am waiting for Mr. RIght (even though he got hit my a semi and died somewhere along the way of finding me) but in the mean time i'm a having a little fun with some of the wrong ones. I have a friend with benefits well sort of. Its complicated to explain. There are no strings attached and we aren't supposed to get emotionally attached HELL I"M A GRIL of course i got attached i've known him since freshman year in high school and i liked him back then but shit happens. I just enjoy the time we do spend together and just brush it all off cuz if its meant to be it will happen and there is no need to push the issue. I did tell him however that one day he's going to wake up and find me gone and i wont be there when he wishes i was and that it will be his own fault cuz he pushed me away. Ok well i think i've ranted enough for tonight so i'll end this i need to get dinner made anyways give the kid a bath then hopefully off to bed then tv time for me then off to bed before it gets to late.

ME AGAIN

so it is me again. i don't really have too much to say this time. April is almost over which is good i guess. it seems like this whole year is going by so fast. I am still working at the milkyway for now i have been however submiting my resume in a few places. i am going on Tues (my only day off) to manpower to apply they have a factory job for the air filter place in town (donaldson) for $9 an hour hey that's better than what i make plus if i get on full-time i can get benefits EVEN BETTER. however this past monday was a nice monday my check was good (however mostly gone now oopps damn bills) i finally got my raise so i was happy i went from 6.55 to 7 an hour which is good for the most part still really isn't enough when you are raising a child and want to be able to put money in a savings account to buy a house and get your teeth fixed and shit oh well at least it pays the bills right now. Its been so nice out lately i've been walking to work and home from work on days i work during the day so that has saved a little money since gas is almost $4 a gallon SCREW THAT SHIT. The only thing i have planned right now for may is my son's kindergarten field trip on the 13th to the indy zoo i already asked for the day off so i can't wait. well i better run and head off to bed so i can get up for work i think that's all i do anymore oh well

Almost weekend

OK I THOUGHT I HAD POSTED ONE A FEW DAYS AGO BUT MAYBE I DIDNT WHO KNOWS THINGS GET CRAZY. MY SON SAW THE THERAPIST AGAIN THIS WEEK AND THIS TIME WE SET UP AN APPOINTMENT TO SEE THE DR THAT CAN GIVE OUT MEDS AT THE CLINIC AND WELL THE CRAPPY PART IS I HAVE TO WAIT TILL JUNE 19TH TO SEE HIM SO WE ARE JUST TAKING IT WEEK TO WEEK NOW AND DAY TO DAY NOW. SHE REALLY THINKS HE HAS ADHD. AS LONG AS IT WILL HELP HIM FOCUS I'M ALL FOR IT THAT WAY HE CAN STAY IN SCHOOL AND MOVE ON BECAUSE THE WAY HE IS RIGHT NOW IF HE ACTS THIS WAY IN 1ST GRADE HE MIGHT GET KICKED OUT AND HAVE TO REPEAT IT AND IF I CAN KEEP FROM HIM GOING THROUGH THAT THEN I WILL... HE IS SO SMART JUST HAS WAY TOO MUCH ENERGY. ANYWAYS SO FAR GRILL HAS BEEN OK. I HAD TODAY OFF AND NOW WORK UNTIL WED WHICH IS FINE WITH ME I GET ABOUT ONE DAY A WEEK OFF RIGHT NOW WHICH BELIEVE ME I WILL TAKE ALL THE HOUSE I CAN GET JUST SO I CAN START PUTTING MONEY BACK INTO MY SAVING ACCOUNT BECAUSE I KINDA TOOK SOME OUT THIS WEEK AND SPENT IT ON SOEMTHING FOR KRIS AND I WE GOT A WII ITS GREAT HE LOVES IT AND WE PLAY IT TOGETHER WHEN I GET HOME FROM WORK AND SINCE I HAD TODAY OFF HE GOT TO PLAY IT A LONG TIME HE BEATS MY ASS ON THE BOWLING GAME HE IS REALLY GOOD AT IT THE GREAT PART IS THAT THE WII CAN PLAY GAMECUBE GAMES SO WE RENTED SOME OF THEM FROM THE MOVIE STORE AND HE CAN PLAY THEM WITH A NORMAL GAMECUBE ROMOTE WHILE I'M AT WORK WHICH WILL WORK GOOD FOR WEEKENDS SO MOM DOES'NT HAVE TO FIND SOMETHING TO KEEP HIM BUSY AND SHE CAN REST A LITTLE SINCE SHE WORKS LIKE 20 OR MORE HOURS FROM FRIDAY NIGHT TILL SAT. AFTERNOON. WELL I NEED TO GET GOING SO I CAN GET TO BED I HAVE TO GO BACK TO WORK TOMORROW I'M IN THE GRILL TILL MONDAY I THINK CAN'T REALLY REMEMBER MY SCHEDUAL OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD OH WELL LOL

Where is this year going??/

MAYBE ITS JUST ME BUT THIS YEAR SEEMS TO BE GOING FAST WHICH IS KIND OF NICE I GUESS. WORK IS WORK NOTHING NEW THERE OTHER THAN THE FACT ON SUNDAY I START TRAINING IN THE GRILL AS A COOK I'M A LITTLE NERVOUSE THE ONLY REASON I'M TRAINING IN THE GRILL IS BECAUSE BOB HAS BEEN TALKING ABOUT MAKING ME A SHIFT SUPERVISOR WHICH WOULD BE COOL!!!! BUT YOU CAN ONLY BE THAT IF YOU ARE THE COOK FOR THE NIGHT SO I HAVE TO TRAIN FOR THAT WHICH SHOULDN'T BE TOO HARD I JUST DONT LIKE MESSING THINGS UP LIKE THAT. KRIS STARTED SEEING A THERAPIST THIS PAST WED. WE DONT KNOW A WHOLE LOT FROM THAT APPOINTMENT BECAUSE IT WAS JUST TRYING TO FIND OUT WHAT IS GOING ON AND STUFF SHE SAW HOW WELL HE SAT STILL (HOW WELL HE CAN'T SIT STILL THAT IS LOL) SO HE GOES BACK NEXT WEEK. SHE WANTS TO TRY SOME DIFFERENT THINGS BEFORE PUTTING HIM ON MEDS WHICH IS NICE. FOR THE MOST PART EVERYTHING IS GOING GOOD I GUESS. STILL SINGLE BUT WHAT ELSE IS NEW I REALLY THINK MY MR. RIGHT GOT HIT BY A SEMI-TRUCK LOL.... WELL I NEED TO GET LUNCH STARTED AND ALL THAT FUN PARENT STUFF. HOPE EVERYONE HAS A GOOD WEEKEND I KNOW I WILL WORK TONIGHT AND TOMORROW NIGHT THEN GOING OUT TOMORROW AFTER WORK THEN WORK SUNDAY NIGHT FUN FUN MY NEXT DAY OFF ISN'T UNTIL NEXT THURS. WHICH WORKS FOR ME

lala

So I know dont write much on here been very busy with work and taking care of my child. in fact the school helped me to get him into see a doc about his behavioral problems i kept trying on my own and i kept getting told they were full but when the school called they had an opening for the 26th of March so we'll see how that goes for the most part he is doing pretty good. Academically speaking he's very smart but they have other issues with him. right now they think a lot of it has to do with sensory so i dont know i guess its all a guessing and waiting game. Work is going pretty good i guess have good days and bad days just like anywhere else. I'm a little worried about my mom right now she has started getting chest pains in the last few days she keeps telling me its nothing major but i dont know what to believe. Knowing that in a few short days i'll be 25 and I am a single mom of a 6 year old boy working a job that pays peanuts there is no way i can handle something major right now. Its been 23 years now since my dad passed I dont really remember him but hey i wasn't even 2 yet so why would i. I have so pics and one of the ladys i work with remembers him and my mom in fact she thinks she was working for the laywer who took care of some stuff after he passed but can't remember for sure. I'm just rambling trying to keep myself motivated today. I get to work from 4 to close i hope we aren't real busy tonight i dont want to be there past 9 like we were last night. Then i'm going out with some friends to drink for my bday then i have to be back at work at 11:45 tomorrow moring which is going to be interesting. Well i better get going so i can get ready for work. hopefully after tonight i'll have some new pics but i wont hold my breath if someone takes a pic of me it might break the camarea LOL.... have a good weekend

NEW JOB

SO I STARTED A NEW JOB LAST MONDAY I WANTED TO WAIT AND SEE HOW I LIKED IT BEFORE I POSTED ANYTHING ABOUT IT JUST IN CASE. IT'S PRETTY EASY I WORK AT THE MILKYWAY SO ITS JUST LIKE WORKING AT DAIRY QUEEN FOR THE MOST PART FOR ME THERE ARE THINGS THAT ARE DIFFERENT. IT'S ONLY A SEASONAL JOB BUT AT LEAST ITS A JOB FOR NOW. I'M WAITING FOR FRITOLAY TO START HIRING AGAIN WHICH WONT BE TILL SOMETIME IN MARCH MAYBE AND THEN I'M GOING TO SEE IF I CAN GET ON THERE. BETTER PAY AND BETTER BENNIFITS THAN ZACHARY'S WELL I BETTER GET GOING THAT WAY I CAN GET THE KID INTO THE BATH AND READY FOR BED AND ALL THAT FUN STUFF HE DON'T HAVE SCHOOL TOMORROW AND I DONT WORK TILL TUE. MORNING SO IT WILL BE FUN I GUESS

Same old thing just another day

So i haven't been on here lately because we were having problems with dialup so we got hi-speed now which is much nicer. Still looking for a job. if nothing else i could always go back to zachary's in june when everyone else does but since the ex is now manager out there i really would rather not go back there. Not a lot has been going on. Spent new years eve at home and Sober (first in about 5yrs) come to think of it my last drink was the same day i got liad off oh well that's prob. a good thing in a way. Had a meeting last week at school for my son. They were talking about putting him in special ed class but he doesn't fit in any of their profile for that which in a lot of ways is good. we are having a lot of behavioral problems with him and he has a real hard time concentrating. They have a special person who sits next to him to help him stay focused and when he does his work he has to be touching her hand or her arm and we can't really figure it out. Academically speaking he is the head of his class (no he did not get that from me duh) He is pretty smart when he wants to be but that's the prob. its when he wants to be. they think some of his problems is because some of his motor skills did not develop like they should have. the meeting was very long and i sat there feeling like it was something i did wrong which that wouldn't surpirse me i can't do nothin right. He stayed the night at a friends house for the first time Sunday night because he didnt have school monday. That was the first time he's ever stayed the night away from me however he came home and didnt want to stay at home and got mad at me because i told him he couldnt stay there again monday night because he had school on Tues. So since he threw a fit and hit me he doesnt get to do that again for awhile. Other than all that i think everything is going good. oh yea and i'm really upset at my brother (the youngest one) because i got told he would call when he got back from germany and well its almost the middle of the month and haven't heard from him go figure he's always doing that lol.... well i'll write more later when i might have something to say